First of all, I apologize to all the blogger friends I have. I have not been a good commenter and plan on getting better again soon. I promise I have not forgotten about you!!
What a crazy week. Its been a crazy,fearful, full of praying and crying to God, just crying, laughing, serious, scary, makes you think thoughts you never thought you would be thinking kind of weeks.
Thanks to all who have helped. To all of you single moms out there, ROCK ON!!!
Michael has been in the hospital since Monday night and until yesterday, yucky fear tried to control my spirit. My fear robbed me of joy, and my sweet girl deserves more than that. Some crazy thoughts have run through my head, so crazy I am embarrased to post them. I can not wait to have my Michael home. Life will be different for the next few months, but we will manage.
As much as I have had some really really hard emotional moments this week, I still heard God. More than a whisper sometimes and that makes those moments okay. I will say this, if you are going to ask God for something, give Him time and room to do it. You can not control God or the things in your life.
It was also a humbling week. LynnMarie got to play with several new friends this week. You have to understand, I despise asking for help. I feel like a failure, always have. This was another burden, as I did not want to burden my friends. I can not stand that feeling. Friends took LM for a few hours each day so I could spend time at the hospital with Michael and talk to some of the doctors. Friends, the time you gave me was the best gift in the world. Sometimes, you have to ask for help. Some people need the opportunity to help.
LM and I have some moments of our own. Talking to God together is a precious thing. She has no idea what I am doing, but she gets quiet at the right time. Oh she is the sweetest thing.
So, keep praying for the Christopher family. Gonna leave you with some lyrics that are pretty summing up how I feel these days.
Whatever You're Doing by Sanctus Real
It's time for healing time to move on
It's time to fix what's been broken too long
Time make right what has been wrong
It's time to find my way to where I belong
There's a wave that's crashing over me
All I can do is surrender
(Chorus)
Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos somehow there's peace
It's hard to surrender to what I can't see
but I'm giving in to something heavenly
Time for a milestone
Time to begin again
Revaluate who I really am
Am I doing everything to follow your will
or just climbing aimlessly over these hills
So show me what it is you want from me
I give everything I surrender...
To...
(Chorus)
Time to face up
Clean this old house
Time to breathe in and let everything out
That I've wanted to say for so many years
Time to to release all my held back tears
Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but I believe
You're up to something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly
Whatever you're doing inside of me
It feels like chaos but now I can see
This something bigger than me
Larger than life something heavenly
Something heavenly
It's time to face up
Clean this old house
Time breathe in and let everything ou
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7 comments:
Nothing wrong with relaying of friends. It's actually a good thing to have friends that you really trust to entrust something as prescious as your little girl. I hope Michael is doing better. You guys are in my thoughts.
I agree! That's what friends are for and true friends are only too happy to help! Hope everything is going well and that Michael is feeling better. You're in our prayers.
Sounds like God is answering our prayers. I too am happy to watch LM is needed. You've gotta ask for help. We are intended to live in community.
Happy Mother's Day, Amy! I know this will be the most extra special in your memory for many many years!
Amy, I've learned that being able to ask for help and to help others in return is the most wonderful and freeing thing! God had to let me be laid flat on my back 6 weeks before my wedding with mono to teach me that, but it is a critical lesson to learn if we are to succeed in this life. I'm sorry for the circumstances that are causing it, but I'm glad you are taking away valuable lessons from this time. God doesn't waste any of our hurts, and it is important for us to do likewise! Love ya and keep on keeping on. :-) Jan
Wow, you have been going through alot! Don't be afraid to lean on those friends, I am sure they are more than happy to help you out and that's what friends are for! Praying for your family during this difficult time!!!
Oh Amy, I so understand that "asking for help" thing. I hate to do it...yet I love to give it. I finally had to realize that this is how we give and receive blessings. I'm glad you let people help you this week. Praying for you, Michael and LM!! Where are you going to be in FL?
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