Tonight I will go in for my 3rd night in a row and although its been a pretty easy weekend, its been emotionally draining. In my 7 years at CHOA, I had to do something I have never done before nor do I ever want to do it again. Ok, I am warning you, sad post ahead.
I had a patient, I shall call her "C"who was admitted for a brain tumor. Newly diagnosed. All this family knew was it was in her head and were hanging out for diagnosis and observation.
She had an MRI and we were waiting results. Dr. Reisner, my favorite doctor and neurosurgeon patted my shoulder and said 'Amy, its bad, really bad." Be prepared. This is another wonderful family." Dr. Reisner is an awesome, honest doctor and I did not know what to do with this info. Usually, its a day shift thing. Mom was at Walmart when Dr. Reisner came to talk and he talked to dad. He let dad know the tumor was inoperable and on her brain stem and that the oncology doctors would talk with him tomorrow. Dr. Reisner asked me to call the chaplain and then he had to go into surgery.
Mom and her sister came back from the store and we found a quiet place to talk. The chaplain asked me to go in with her and I immediately started praying. Dad told mom but was not clear at all, so I had to step in and explain them. Thank God for chaplains. I truly felt like I was having an out of body experience. So, I had to explain exactly what the Dr told me in a room. You have to know that mom is due to deliver baby number 5 any day now so I had that on top of everything. We sat in this room with the family while the chaplain prayed. I could only tell them exactly what the doctor told them but also wanted so badly to give them some hope but didn't want to give them any false hope. I listened to mom cry out "Are you giving me this new baby to make my goodbye easier"? I wish I was making this up. I am so glad I am working 3 days in a row so I could get to know this family and little girl. Their family was forever changed the other day.
Sunday afternoon, they learned the tumor is one of the worse you can have and that even with radiation they are looking at a year or two at the most. It is surreal. Please pray for this family and their support system. Mom needs to give birth this week so they can make plans for treatment and other decisions.
God is good. I want them to see that. I wish I could have done more.
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14 comments:
Hi, thanks for the comment on my blog:-) What a sad thing you're going through at work. I don't think I could ever work in health care, for those (and other gory) reasons. I guess you just have to cope with it by remembering that every thing happens for a reason, and, the more difficult the situation, the more to gain...it's still awful though. {{{hugs}}}
I'm praying for that family and that little girl. Hugs to you Amy
I spent this morning praying for this family. What a blessing that the Lord has you in these horrible circumstances, to pray and comfort!
I admire you for your strength!
Amy I will join you and the others in prayer for that little girls and her family.
I can't even imagine and don't even want to :( You have such an emotional strain on you with your career. I am happy to see that you handle it with the best care possible.
Wow...tough stuff! I can't even imagine what some of these families have to go through.
praying now
I will be praying for this family. Unfortunately, I can imagine what they are going through on some level. You are such a great person Amy, great nurse also, but you have a really great heart. I'm so glad we got to meet you! Hopefully, we will never have to be back in the dungeon again, but if we do, I hope you are our nurse again (and no ER visits this time please)! <3
Praying. Hope your apptment was good. :)
OH my goodness.. that is so sad.. I'll be praying with you for the family.
oh my ... i will pray ... i am not sure how you do it ... i am sure you are a huge comfort to those you sit w/, talk w/ and encourage ...
Yall are great but its not about me. Well the post actually sounded like it was about me and thats not the way I wanted it to come across. Thank you for your kind words but please pray for C and her family. They have a huge decision ahead of them
I am glad you are able to share with us prayer requests, Amy. Know that I will be praying for this family and for you, too, as you minister and help them through. It takes a special person to do what you do!
Amy, I often wonder about the staff at hospitals and how it affects them when their patients are dying. My father spent a month in ICU last year and we watched him almost die and then regain a miraculous recovery with some of the best nurses in the country watching over him. Thanks for giving us your perspective and reminding us that our medical teams are real people, with real feelings and real emotions. Not just going through the motions...
Big hug,
Cb
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